11/23/21 Chapter 19 “Reconciling with PURPOSE” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4LiYbntP_g Hi everyone! As usual, this letter has been started and stopped over several days. We have spent the last 9 of 10 nights on the road and are finally back “home,” but still have a busy couple of days ahead. We’re doing well! No matter how hard it appears- God is always there and it always turns out, so we’re going to accept this pace and intensity and put our energy into learning to roll and duck and stretch and grow rather than in hoping it will slow down. It’s just going to be like this, and we absolutely know we’ll be blessed to handle it. I told some of the missionaries this week that my weaknesses are still terribly visible to me, but somehow over the years, the spirit is able to more quickly and more fully rescue me from doubt and fear and lift me into an eternal perspective. I’m so grateful for that gift. God is so generous with His portions of hope. I know in whom I place my trust and in nothing else has there been a more worthy pursuit! One of my grandsons helped me identify a pattern that has proved helpful in achieving that. That is to give purpose to our challenges. After hearing that he was crying every night for the first few months because he missed us so badly, I asked our mission therapist how we could help him. I shared with him that in every letter or conversation he would say things like, “I know you and Opa are saving the world, but I really miss you” or “I know the Prophet has asked you to go, but I really miss you.” He pointed out to me how Nash was instinctively trying to reconcile his grief with purpose and it was a brilliant coping mechanism; one he tries to get the missionaries to use! Since then, I’ve recognized that same pattern in my own reconciliations and have found great power in it, especially because it gives the Savior a prominent place in the solution! After speaking in Stake Conference this weekend, a woman came up to me and said, “I don’t know how you leave your grandchildren for 3 years. I just couldn’t do it.” I thought for a second, considering the miracle that has brought us here and replied, “I think it helps to focus on what you’re walking toward, not from.” Like any human who loves, we’d fall apart if we only looked back at what we’d left. Especially when what lies before us is so compelling. That purpose has the power to overcome the pain of separation. Last evening a sister missionary, in her second transfer, hung back from a conference we’d just held and asked to speak with me. We went into a little classroom and shut the door for privacy where she threw her arms around me and sobbed. I just held her, stroked her hair and let her take the time she needed. She managed to whisper, “Thank you, this feels safe.” When she was ready, we sat down and I pulled my chair up to hers; knee to knee and held her hands while she spoke about her love of the work and the people and her companion but felt overcome with emotion she couldn’t pin down. Bless her heart! I asked her if it would surprise her to know I have felt the same way? Away from home on Thanksgiving eve, her heart was naturally inclined to what she had left behind. It’s the most human response we have when we love people. The only antidote, besides loosing ourselves in the work, is to connect with our purpose; our reason for coming in the first place. She relaxed with hope as she realized the two strong feelings of loss and purpose could exist in the same place as she made her purpose the greater focus. When we learned our oldest son, Jordan, was to be sustained and set apart as Bishop this weekend, we knew exactly how inadequate and overwhelmed he would be feeling, but we also knew the only way to reconcile the sacrifices would be to focus on what it’s all for! When we’re able to do that, we make our sacrifices Holy and eventually discover they are no sacrifice at all! We do what we do for Christ! Because we love Him! All the satisfactions of being a disciple are found in relationships; with our missionaries, with our family, all those we labor with, and with Christ. Identifying that purpose deflects the feelings of loss, motivates us through separation, buffers lasting pain and reveals indescribable joy! The last day of our road trip we were able to visit a tiny little branch at Fort Leonard Wood Military Base. When we arrived, they scrapped the speakers they had planned and turned the whole meeting over to us. Though that was a surprise, the spirit whispered their needs and we simply spoke the soothing words of the Savior. These incredible men and women were eager and open as Rick spoke to them about how natural it was to think of home during this season, but invited them to let their hearts be drawn to their Heavenly home; where we lived before we came to earth and where we’d be able to return after this life. I shared how God wishes to give liberally (generously) to those who ask and about how eagerly He forgives because his purpose was to save us, not to condemn, us! There were 150 soldiers, most of which were not of our faith, but who had found refuge and peace in our meetings. The same age as our missionaries, many of them away from home for the first time, and needing to be stronger than they felt inside. They too are sustained through their purpose: their sense of duty, love of countries and desire to serve! The common thread for us ALL is to have found purpose in our challenge! It is the only thing to hold on to when times get tough! Of course, the greatest example of being sustained by purpose is our Savior. Even He asked to be spared from the cross if there was some other way. But when the most difficult event of his life was before Him, He chose to willingly endure it... because of LOVE! WE were his purpose! I find the greatest of consolation in that truth at this Thanksgiving time! He found the strength, the will and the motivation to finish the agony of His Atonement out of love for US! And I find the strength to do what is required of me- out of love for HIM! Jeffery R. Holland said it this way, “…The first great commandment of all eternity is to love God with all of our heart, might, mind, and strength—But the first great truth of all eternity is that God loves us with all of His heart, might, mind, and strength. That love is the foundation stone of eternity, and it should be the foundation stone of our daily life. Indeed, it is only with that reassurance burning in our soul that we can have the confidence to keep trying to improve, keep seeking forgiveness for our sins, and keep extending that grace to our neighbor… No matter how serious the trial, how deep the distress, how great the affliction, [God] will never desert us. He never has, and He never will. He cannot do it. It is not His character [to do so]. … He will [always] stand by us..” This Thanksgiving I cannot think of ANYTHING I want to hold on to more than this truth! I know God gives power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. “… They that wait upon [Him] shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles…” “For … the Lord … God will hold [their] right hand, saying unto [them], Fear not; I will help thee.” (Isaiah 40:28, 29, 31) If we give our heart to God, if we love the Lord Jesus Christ, if we do the best we can to live the gospel, then tomorrow—and every other day—is ultimately going to be magnificent. That has certainly been the case for us! I know it can be so for you! With all my heart I know it’s true! Have a blessed and happy Thanksgiving! Elder and Sister Collins